A little but not too late.

Some days, I feel that my improvements this time are going to be “too late” and not enough to make me feel a useful person for this world. It is very important for me to create and to accept on a gut level what “enough” means. Also I need to forget thinking about the life that I had hoped for and accept the pain that came with having another brain injury that took away years of hard work and persistence to get in a late position to realize certain dreams that I had once had.

I want to be like the children building sand castles on the beach. They do not see it a waste of time putting in all the effort to build their castle when a wave comes and takes it away. They don’t care if the beach day is coming to an end. They stay focused and go to a new spot even if the sand is not as good  and they begin building again. They enjoy it all. And if their mother says it is time to go and they have just started on their new sand castle that is incomplete, they may stamp their feet and protest to their mother, but soon enough they are sleeping in peace from a day well-spent.


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In 1991, I suffered a brain injury. It showed itself in a variety of ways- and baffled everyone including myself. In the following entries it is my hope that we as a people, might respect those with differences and realize that we don't know the full story. It is written also with our soldiers in mind, coming home with injuries that are misunderstood and brain injuries/ptsd that cause unnecessary suffering and to isolation. It is written for those with autistic traits who are shunned by their peers. It is written for stroke victims who have no more voice in society and the people who do not take the time, to listen. It is written to all with invisible injuries that go discounted, dismissed and discarded. Peace.

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